Temporary Solutions
by TheLostMaximoff
Summary: So while the Acolytes and the X-Men were busy trying to save the world in 'Dark Horizons' what were the Brotherhood doing? Making alcohol-induced mischief of course.
1. Hex Drunk Love

Temporary Solutions

By TheLostMaximoff

Disclaimer: Don't own this stuff but you can bet if I did I'd give the Brotherhood more screen time. I was thoroughly disappointed that they got left behind in 'Dark Horizon'. I mean they have like one of the most powerful mutants in the show (Wanda) on their roster and they still get no respect. Anyways, this is just my little idea of what they were doing while the X-Men and the Acolytes were busy trying to save the world.

Bare. Wanda sighed in disgust as she slammed the cabinet shut and opened the next one. Bare again. She let out a frustrated growl and repeated the process twice with the same results.

"Is there any semblance of sustenance in this God forsaken rathole?" she asked as she turned towards the living room. Toad quizzically gazed at her. She could almost hear the gears grinding as he tried to decipher her question and formulate a reply.

"We're pretty much outta food," he said finally. Wanda threw up her hands. Well, of course, she could see that. She wasn't an idiot. She was about to unleash a blistering retort but she stopped herself. Toad was not the problem, not at the moment. The problem was, aside from that stupid TV which she refused to watch, there was no distraction to keep her from worrying about Pietro. He and the rest of the Acolytes had gone with Magneto, Xavier, and the X-Men to God knows where in order to stop Apocalypse. As usual, the Brotherhood had stayed at the house. Well, technically, she and Toad had stayed at the house. Lance had gone to a party since it was graduation and Freddy, lured by the promise of free food, had accompanied him. Wanda had opted to stay home and, as usual, she had her lovely amphibian shadow to keep her company.

"Not even any damn ice cream," she mumbled as she glanced at the fridge, "Probably go straight to my hips anyways." She looked around and noticed something odd. One of the cabinets was padlocked.

"Hey, Toad?" she asked, "How come this one's locked?" Toad got up and came into the kitchen.

"Oh, Mystique did that last time she was here," he explained, "She said she'd flay us alive if we ever opened it and kept the only key. We were gonna find out what was in it but with Magneto Jr. marchin' us around lately we don't have time." Wanda nodded. She still couldn't stop worrying about Pietro. Sure she seemed to be angry with him for no reason but he was still her brother and she was still concerned for his safety.

"Well," she said to herself as Toad went back to the TV, "let's just see what's in here." She ran her fingers over the lock and watched it melt in her hand. She opened the cabinet and arched an eyebrow. Apparently, Mystique had a fondness for liquor. Wanda instantly understood why she had locked it, what with four teenage boys living in the house.

"Say, Toad," she called back into the living room, "You ever drink before?" Toad got up and came back into the kitchen. He gave the cabinet's contents a skeptical look.

"Once or twice, yeah," he replied hesitantly, "It's not really my thing. Why?"

"Just wondered if you wanted to have a drink," replied Wanda as she pulled a bottle from the cabinet and then went to get a glass. She didn't remember ever drinking before and she had a very good memory when it came to things like that. Still, she didn't have anything else to do besides go crazy worrying about Pietro so why not?

"Uhm, sweetheart," said Toad, "I don't think that's such a good idea, you drinkin' and all." Wanda ignored his pet name and popped the top off the bottle with her powers.

"Why's that?" she asked.

"Because, well, for one thing it's bad for ya," said Toad, "and two, if ya get drunk enough ya might do some stuff you'd regret in the morning." Wanda rolled her eyes.

"Oh please," she replied, "I'm not going to turn into some blithering idiot or throw myself all over someone after a few beers. I have way too much self-control for that." Toad snorted. Wanda and self-control got along about as well as oil and water.

"So?" asked Wanda, "You going to join me? They say it's not good to drink alone." Toad sighed. He figured it was best to go along. After all, the more he drank the less for Wanda and it was probably the best way to keep an eye on her.

"Okay," he said, "but I'm stopping after one beer and you should too."

"Don't be a worry wart," cracked Wanda as she poured him a glass and handed it to him.

"Cheers," she said as they clinked their glasses together.

XXXXXXX

He should be happy. If he were any other normal teenager he would be happy about graduation. But no, he was Lance Alvers and all graduation did was depress him. He deserved that diploma as much as anyone after the hell he'd been through. It wasn't fair that a stupid little expulsion had to ruin his chances. He kept telling himself it didn't matter but he knew it was a lie. He had lost it, his one chance of showing everyone that he was more than a deadbeat delinquent. He had thrown away his last chance to make Kitty proud of him.

"Hell," he mumbled. He guessed it really didn't matter now anyway since she wasn't even speaking to him anymore. It didn't stop him from worrying about her. He hoped that wherever she was she was okay right now.

"Party's over," he said to himself as he looked around for Freddy. He had come to the party to try and take his mind off of Kitty placing herself in mortal danger. He had failed at that too. Best to just go back to the house and continue the road to nowhere.

"Hey, Lance." Lance turned around and raised an eyebrow.

"Tabby?" he asked as the blond, ex-Brotherhood member gave him a smile.

"The one and only," she replied, "What'cha doin' here? Figured you'd be on red alert like everybody else." Lance shook his head.

"We're the second-stringers now," he replied, "This one's too hot for us. What about you?"

"Same deal," replied Tabby, "With the Prof and everybody else gone the mansion's too boring so I thought I'd have a little fun. You know me, Lancey, can't resist a party." Lance nodded. Tabby was ever one to have fun. He could tell she had already started drinking although with Tabby you could never tell what was drunk and what was just flakiness.

"So how's life with the nerd squad?" he asked. Tabby just smiled.

"Boring as ever," she replied, "You guys may not have been very exciting but you were better than the Xavier crew any day. You the only one here?"

"Nah," replied Lance, "Freddy's around somewhere, surprised you haven't already seen him." Tabby nodded, Freddy wasn't that hard to miss.

"His hair recovered from that surprise shave I gave him?" she asked with a grin.

"Yeah," replied Lance as he shook his head and smiled. Tabby giggled.

"Well, no chaperones, no supervision, no curfew," said Tabby, "What's a girl like me gonna do with all her free time?"

"Something tells me you already have an idea and I'm not gonna like it," replied Lance warily. While Tabby hadn't been the worst housemate ever she had developed a successful track record in the bad idea department that didn't seem to show any signs of shortening.

"Well that all depends on whether or not you drove here," she replied in a flirty tone. Lance groaned.

"This isn't going to involve you stealin' my jeep again, is it?" he asked.

"Not if you agree to drive," said Tabby coyly, "Go get Freddy. We're gonna play a little game called 'Special Delivery'." Lance didn't like the sound of that.

XXXXXXX

"So then Dad comes in and boy is he pissed," said Wanda, "I don't think I've ever heard him yell that loud." She giggled as she tilted her bottle back and finished it. Both she and Toad were now sitting on the couch in the living room. Well, Toad was sitting and Wanda had just decided his lap would make a nice pillow.

"Do we have anymore?" she asked. Toad shook his head.

"I think you're through for the night," he said.

"Oh nonsense," replied Wanda as she unsuccessfully tried to get up, "I feel perfectly fine. I have too much . . ."

"Self-control," finished Toad, "You said that after the last one, cuddles." Wanda giggled again at his pet name. She stopped and stared at him with a dazed look on her face.

"I just noticed something," she said, "You have green eyes but they got this . . . yellow, filmy stuff over 'em."

"Yeah, so?" asked Toad. It was weird to watch Wanda actually behave like a normal person for once. Toad wasn't sure whether he should like it or not.

"They're kinda cute," she replied with a smile, "You're kinda cute actually." She hiccupped and then started laughing so hard she almost rolled off the couch.

"Alright," said Toad, "I think it's bedtime for you."

"No, no," replied Wanda, "I'm fine." Toad looked at her and shook his head.

"You're so drunk," he replied.

"I am not," she replied angrily, "I told you I'm fine. I'll prove it to you. If I can . . ." She let the word trail off as she looked around lazily.

"Set those bottles on the window," she said. Toad shook his head and grabbed the empty bottles. He got up and put the bottles in a row on the windowsill. Wanda sat up and had to brace herself to keep from falling over.

"If I," she stated, "can make all five of those bottles fall over then I'm okay." Toad shook his head but made a motion that Wanda should go ahead and try. There was no way she could do it, she was too drunk.

"Okay, watch," said Wanda as she pointed at the bottles. Toad yelped as the window shattered. That was certainly going to get them in trouble.

"Okay, two outta three," stated Wanda as she pointed again. Toad didn't really want to break anything else so he wrapped his tongue around Wanda's arm and pulled her hand down.

"You're way too drunk ta be hexin' anything, snugglebunny," he stated.

"I am not drunk," stated Wanda emphatically as she stamped her foot. Instantly, all five bottles spontaneously shattered.

"Okay, okay," agreed Toad, "You're not drunk but you do look tired. How about we go to bed?"

"Oh alright," said Wanda dejectedly. Toad happily helped Wanda up to her feet. Finally, this nonsense would be over. He could clean up the glass and when Lance came home they would figure out what to do about the window.

"Not so fast," said Wanda as Toad helped her over to the stairs. He had to steady her to keep her from falling over.

"Sorry," he replied as they finally reached the top of the stairs. He looked over to his room and decided that since it was closer to the bathroom she should sleep in there for the night. He could sleep downstairs or something.

"Why're we in your room?" asked Wanda groggily.

"Because you'll be closer to the bathroom in case ya need ta throw up," explained Toad, hoping that she wouldn't think this was some kind of attempt to sleep with her. He may be slimy but he certainly had more class than that.

"What about you?" she asked. Wanda's legs had apparently ceased to function at this point and Toad was almost dragging her to the bed.

"I'll sleep somewhere else that's not your room or my room," assured Toad. Wanda's legs decided to awaken from their near-death experience and chose that moment to work again. Unfortunately, they got tangled up with Toad's and the result being both of them falling onto the bed.

"Well," said Wanda with a smile as she suddenly found herself on top of Toad, "this is certainly interesting." Toad turned bright red as he tried to get up. Strangely, Wanda kept him pinned down.

"Then again," continued Wanda, "you were the one who said we should go to bed."

"I didn't mean it like that," explained Toad sheepishly. Wanda smiled playfully and moved her face closer to his.

"I think you did," she said slyly, "I know you want me, Toady, and the funny thing is that right now I think I want you too." She kissed him on the lips. When she broke away he looked at her. It was the alcohol talking, practically screaming. She was drunk. This wasn't right.

"You're not yourself," said Toad, "I'm not gonna take advantage of you, Wanda."

"Fine with me," said Wanda seductively, "but right now I wouldn't mind it so long as it's you." She kissed him again. Toad pulled back using almost all of his willpower.

"I have to tell you a little secret," whispered Wanda hotly in his ear, "I think that tongue of yours is incredibly sexy."

XXXXXXX

"So how exactly do you play Special Delivery?" asked Lance as he turned into a suburban neighborhood. Tabby smiled from her position in the passenger seat.

"It's really easy," she said, "All you gotta do is get real close to people's mailboxes then drive away really fast."

"What're you gonna do?" asked Freddy from his seat in the back. Tabby's grin got even bigger.

"I'm gonna be the mailwoman," she said, "Lemme show ya." Lance pulled up near a mailbox. He should've seen it coming. You don't call a girl Boom Boom and expect her to not enjoy blowing things up.

"Go!" shouted Tabby as she quickly opened the box, lobbed a little time bomb inside it, and closed the lid. Lance jammed on the gas and sped away.

"Special delivery," shouted Tabby as the mailbox exploded. She began laughing hysterically.

"And here I thought livin' with the X-nerds had softened you up," said Lance sarcastically, "Tabby, you're gonna get us in serious trouble."

"Oh lighten up," replied Tabby with a smile, "It's not like you guys aren't used to it by now."

"Well, I think we've had enough for one lifetime," replied Lance.

"Hey," said Tabby, "let's do that one next. It looks really expensive." Lance sighed.

"Forget it," he stated, "We're going back to the house."

"Hey," said Freddy, "I think that one's Principal Kelly's house."

"See, there you go," said Tabby, "Don't you wanna get back at him, Lancey? I heard how he expelled you guys. Let's teach 'im a little lesson."

"Alright," sighed Lance, "but just his." Tabby nodded her head. Lance knew full well she wouldn't be satisfied with just one but he had to admit he did want a little revenge on Kelly.

"Don't even stop this time," said Tabby, "I think I can just open and drop." Lance nodded and sped past Kelly's mailbox. In a lightning-quick move that would've made Pietro jealous, Tabby opened the box and shoved a time bomb inside.

"Special delivery," she crowed as the jeep sped away while the box exploded, "See, don't you feel better?" Lance had to admit he felt a small sense of retribution. It had been a long time since he'd had fun like this. It felt good.

"Well," he stated, knowing he would kick himself later, "Maybe we could do a few more."

"I knew there was a reason why you're my favorite person," cooed Tabby.

XXXXXXX

This was not real. This was not real. Toad forced himself to mentally repeat the statement. He looked at the girl that was on top of him. This is not Wanda. This is not Wanda. This is an intoxicated seventeen-year-old who happens to look like her.

"You look tense," said Wanda, "It'll be much better for us both if you loosen up some. I promise I won't bite, much." The only biting occurring now was Toad biting all six feet of his tongue in an attempt to stop himself from giving in to the ungodly amount of temptation he was facing.

"No, see," he struggled to explain, "this is a bad idea. This is probably the worst idea in the history of bad ideas."

"Why's that?" asked Wanda as she took off Toad's shirt and threw it on the floor, "We both know you've been dreaming about this since you first saw me." Well, sure he had. He may love Wanda with all his heart but he wasn't blind to the fact that she was incredibly hot.

But this, this wasn't the way it was supposed to happen. It was supposed to be romantic, magical. He knew there was an almost one hundred percent chance this was her first time and, as much as it hurt him to say no, a drunken one-night stand was no way for a girl to lose her virginity. Plus, in the morning when she was thinking more clearly, she'd probably not only kill him for taking this much advantage of her but castrate him before doing so.

"Wanda, darling," he said as he tried to somehow get out from under her, "You know I love you but you're just not yourself tonight."

"That's perfectly alright with me," cooed Wanda, "I don't think you'll mind either in a little bit." Toad tried to protest but his mouth and Wanda's decided to have a more intimate exchange of ideas. He felt her mouth start to trail down his chest.

"Uhm, sweetie?" he asked as her mouth continued its downward spiral, "You're moving a little too far south here."

"Silly boy," said Wanda with the zipper on Toad's jeans between her teeth, "How else am I supposed to get these pants off of you." Dear Lord, there was no stopping her.

"Wanda," gasped Toad as Wanda deftly removed his pants. Of all days to wear boxers with smiley faces on them this was the most embarrassing.

"Oh, they're so cute," giggled Wanda, "You have to be the most adorable little frog ever."

"Okay, Wanda," said Toad as he tried to get out from under her, "Really, I think we need to stop." He knew she'd get mad but if a little slime in the face could stop both of them from making a mistake then so be it. There was a tiny problem, however. Whatever organ it was that made said slime just decided to go on strike.

"Naughty little boy," hissed Wanda as Toad realized his powers weren't working. Apparently Wanda's aim with hexing improved with proximity.

"What'd you do?" asked Toad. Wanda giggled as she straddled him and continued to kiss him playfully on the neck.

"Disabled your powers," she replied, "The first time I kissed you." Bad Wanda, very bad Wanda. Dear God, why must she torture innocent amphibians?

"Wanna see a magic trick?" asked Wanda. Toad gulped and shook his head in a violent no.

"It's really good," promised Wanda, "I'm about to turn a scared little tadpole into a big adult frog."

XXXXXXX

Lance had to admit he was having fun. It had been a long time since he'd randomly destroyed something for no reason. It was certainly a very good way to let out one's frustrations.

"Uhm, guys," said Freddy, "I think those police officers wanna talk to us." Lance looked in the mirror and saw the familiar flashing lights of "The Man" behind them.

"Now the fun's really startin'," said Tabby, "Should I blow out their tires?" Lance nervously counted three cruisers and tried to figure out the best way to lose them. He could always work up a few tremors but a driver with a huge headache was never a good idea.

"Rock 'n' roll," he nodded to Tabby. Tabby smiled wickedly as she let out a spray of time bombs that collided with the cruisers' tires and blew them off.

"Man, you guys sure know how to show a girl a good time," she said, "Not even Bobby could think up something this wild."

"Yeah, well I think we've had enough," stated Lance, "We fought the law and won, let's not push our luck."

"Party pooper," sang Tabby, "Hey, ya mind if I crash at the house?"

"You can take Pietro's room," replied Lance, "but just for the night."

"What about Pietro?" asked Tabby, "Don't tell me his sister finally killed him."

"Unfortunately, no," replied Lance bitterly, "He got kicked up to the A-list so he's out savin' the world."

"Aw," said Tabby sadly, "I was lookin' forward to makin' fun of him." Lance smiled at that. She and Wanda should talk.

"Oh yeah," he said, "Pietro's sister, Wanda, has a little bit of a memory problem so don't mention anything about that first time she came here."

"Why not?" asked Tabby. Lance sighed. Wanda's new attitude adjustment seemed to just make things more complicated instead of simplifying them.

"It's just not a good idea," explained Lance, "In fact, try not to interact with her very much at all." Tabby didn't say anything as Lance pulled up to the house.

"Hey, Lance," said Freddy, "Didn't we used to have a window there?"

"Oh hell," mumbled Lance, "Tabby, you stay here while me and Freddy see what happened." He figured Wanda had gotten mad, probably at Todd. He opened the door and smacked himself in the forehead. There was glass all over the floor. He eyed the coffee table by the couch.

"Beer?" he asked as he turned to Freddy, "Where did this come from?" Freddy shrugged. Lance heard a scream that could only be Toad. He ran upstairs and opened the door to Toad's room, figuring Wanda was in the process of torturing him. Well, she was certainly in the process of doing something with him.

"Uhm, Lance," said Toad as Wanda looked up and started laughing hysterically, "This ain't what it looks like, yo." Lance wasn't sure what it looked like. Wanda wasn't wearing a shirt, Toad was wearing only boxers, and it looked like she'd tied his wrists to the bedposts with something. Shoelaces?

"Well, that's good," he said as he came over and pulled Wanda off of Toad, "because it looked like you were about to have sex."

"Aw, Lance," whined Wanda, "You ruined the mood. And after I spent all that time tying him up too."

"Sue me in the morning," replied Lance as he caught a whiff of Wanda's breath, "Alright, I think you need to sleep it off."

"Well I was trying to do that with some help from Toady but somebody had to go and barge in," replied Wanda indignantly. Lance held up a finger in front of Wanda's face and passed it back and forth. Wanda's eyes lazily rolled around to follow it but she wound up getting cross-eyed and started laughing again.

"She's trashed, dude," said Toad as he tried to untie himself, "You wanna gimme a hand here?"

"In a minute," replied Lance, "Let's get her to bed first." He picked Wanda up and started for the door. Wanda groaned.

"Lance," she mumbled, "I think I'm gonna hurl."

"Trashcan," ordered Lance as he turned to see Freddy in the doorway, "I need a trashcan, stat." Freddy grabbed the trashcan. Lance put Wanda down and put the trashcan in front of her. Wanda promptly threw up.

"Now are you gonna untie me?" asked Toad. Lance sighed as he began freeing Toad.

"Pietro's totally gonna kill us for this," said Lance, "Where'd you two get alcohol anyways?"

"Well, that cabinet that had a lock on it," said Toad as he started putting his clothes back on. Lance rolled his eyes. He had figured that's what was in there.

"Wanda had the magic touch," explained Toad before Lance could even ask.

"Wait a minute," said Lance, "She was the one who started all this? And then she seduced you?" Toad nodded.

"I tried to stop her but she gets pretty forceful," explained Toad as Wanda stopped puking, "frisky too."

"Well, I think it's all outta her now," said Lance, "along with anything she ever ate."

"You okay, honey?" asked Toad. Wanda groaned in reply. Toad took that as a no.

"You better empty that thing," said Lance, "I'll get her to bed." He gently picked Wanda up and slowly moved out of the room. Toad nodded as he removed the trash bag and went to throw it away while Freddy went to get Tabby.

"What's Tabby doin' back?" asked Toad as Lance came back downstairs.

"Stayin' the night," he replied as Tabby and Freddy came back into the house. Tabby just looked at the glass on the floor and rolled her eyes.

"Home sweet home," she muttered as she headed up the stairs. Both Lance and Toad sat on the couch while Freddy went to bed.

"Is there any alcohol left?" asked Lance.

"Little bit," replied Toad, "but if you start tryin' ta kiss me I'll kick your teeth out."

"Deal," agreed Lance, "Man, I need a drink." He opened the last bottle and took a sip.

"Rough night?" asked Toad.

"Yep," replied Lance, "Let's just say it involved explosions, police cars, and us."

"Sounds like a bad action movie," cracked Toad, "Wanda okay?"

"Out like a light," said Lance, "She's got a trashcan by her bed if she needs it. She kept mumbling about how it was all her fault. She said not to blame you, that you had been a good boy." Toad beamed at that.

"Tomorrow's gonna be hell with her," said Toad. Lance nodded and took another drink.

"So Pietro and everybody else are out savin' the world," said Toad, "and we're here screwin' it up. Kinda crazy, huh?"

"Yep," replied Lance as he took the bottle into the kitchen and dumped its contents down the sink, "You really do love her, don't you Todd?"

"Of course I do," he replied with a smile, "but sometimes lovin' someone is knowin' when not to show it to 'em, ya know?" Lance shook his head. Tonight was not the night for philosophical musings.

"I say we wait till morning to clean up," he said as he went up the stairs, "I'm goin' to bed."

(Author's Note): Okay, sorry that was so long but thank you for being patient. Before you all start crying and whining, I am planning on continuing this for a part two. I just haven't got around to writing it yet because work sucks.


	2. When It's Over

Temporary Solutions (Part Two)

By TheLostMaximoff

Disclaimer: Do not own. I actually can't think of anything to write here. It's amazing. Just R/R. It makes me very happy, really.

Wanda opened her eyes and looked around. She groaned as she became aware of the throbbing pain in her head.

"Never again," she muttered to herself, "Oh there's no harm in a beer or two or four." She closed her eyes. The sunlight from her window was blinding. It only succeeded in making her headache and her mood worse.

'_How dare it be pleasant outside,'_ she thought to herself as she tried to concentrate enough to make it rain, '_I'll show the world. By God, if I have to be miserable then it does too.'_ Her headache spiked up and she let out another cry of pain as she stopped.

"Note to self," she mumbled, "Don't hex with a hangover." She rolled over away from the accursed sunlight and tried to go back to bed. There was a knock at the door. Either that or her headache had gotten worse. Wanda decided it was both.

"Open," she said groggily. Toad opened the door and shuffled in.

"Morning," he said as he hopped up into a chair next to her bed, "You still alive?"

"Unfortunately," replied Wanda, "Morning, Todd."

"You must be bad," said Toad, "You used my real name." Both he and Wanda smiled.

"Could you close the blinds?" she asked, "The light's really irritating."

"Sure," replied Toad as he wrapped his tongue around the little plastic bar and pulled down the shade while remaining in his chair.

"That's really gross," said Wanda as she rolled onto her stomach and buried her face in her pillow.

"That's funny," said Toad with a smile, "Last night you said it was 'incredibly sexy'. That's a direct quote too." Wanda groaned again. Last night had been a complete disaster.

"Yeah, well anything I said last night is off the record," she replied, "I'm telling you now I think it's revolting."

"Aw, you don't mean that," assured Toad, "You're just cranky."

"How do you know that?" asked Wanda, her voice muffled by the pillow.

"Because you're smiling," said Toad. Wanda looked up at him. Damn him for being right.

"Okay, so maybe I don't think you're as disgusting as I used to," she admitted, "but I still say it's really gross."

"Fair enough, snugglebunny," replied Toad, "So, should I sign you up for Alcoholics Anonymous?"

"No, I think I'm a convert for life," stated Wanda. Toad smiled and nodded his head. It was good to hear.

"Toad?" asked Wanda, "Did you let me get drunk last night on purpose?" Toad hung his head and nodded.

"But not for the reason you're thinkin' of," he explained before Wanda could explode, "I figured it was best for you to learn your lesson the hard way."

"And I thought I was cruel," said Wanda, "You never mentioned hangovers."

"You're not supposed to learn about those till you get 'em," said Toad, "My old man did the same thing with me and cigarettes. When I was like eleven or twelve I decided to start smokin' cause all the cool kids did it. My dad was like, 'Here son, light up.' I took one puff and coughed so much I thought I'd hacked up a lung. I never touched the things since."

"Todd," said Wanda, "I want to thank you for last night. You were an absolute prince and it was very noble of you to resist taking advantage of me even though the temptation must've been awful."

"Well, it was," admitted Toad sheepishly, "I think if Lance hadn't walked in when he did I would've ran out of ideas. You seducin' me wasn't exactly what I had in mind when I let you start drinkin'."

"I'm sorry," apologized Wanda again, "I just wasn't myself."

"It's okay," assured Toad, "You just better realize how close we both came to makin' a huge mistake."

"I wouldn't exactly call it that," replied Wanda, "a mistake sure but a not a huge one. Would you?"

"If you were drunk then yeah," said Toad, "Wanda, the last thing on this planet I'd want to do is hurt you. Actually, if I did it probably would be the last thing I did on this planet."

"Good to hear," replied Wanda, "The first part I mean."

"Hey, Wanda?" asked Toad, "Exactly how much talking did the alcohol do last night?" Wanda pulled the pillow over her face to keep him from seeing her blush.

"What exactly do you mean?" she asked as she removed the pillow once her face had returned to normal.

"I mean is there the slightest chance you might actually love me?" asked Toad, the hope apparent in his eyes. Wanda sighed. It always came back to this.

"I don't know," she replied truthfully, "Do I tolerate you? Well, yeah sure. Do I consider you a friend? Well, after last night it'd be hard not to. Do I love you? I don't know and I don't wanna think about it right now."

"Okay," said Toad as he leaned over and kissed her on the cheek, "That's good enough for me." He turned to go. Wanda's hand touched the spot where he had kissed her. It was sticky with slime.

"I'll bring ya some aspirin," said Toad as he closed the door behind him, "Get some rest, okay?"

"Okay," replied Wanda as she stared at the strand of slime between her fingers. She heard the door close but kept her attention on the slime. She put her finger to her lips and licked it. It tasted absolutely repugnant but there was another flavor in there too. His flavor. She remembered last night when they had kissed, when his slime had tasted like sweet honey. It had felt so good to finally be affectionate with someone, to kiss them, to caress them, to love them.

"No," she mumbled as she grabbed a Kleenex from her dresser and wiped off her fingers, "I was drunk. Everything's better when you're drunk, when you're not yourself. Everything's prettier, nicer, happier when you don't have to be in control."

It was, it had been. She had felt so free, no walls or barriers or anything. She had never felt like that around someone, never loved someone like that. The only people she loved were Father and Pietro and that was just family love. This was a different love, a more intimate one. She had wanted him, every inch of his body. She had wanted to feel him, to taste him, to feel him inside her.

"Oh God," she groaned as she clawed at her head. Damn her brain straight to Hell for thinking such things. This was Toad. He didn't bathe, he smelled like roadkill, he spat slime, and he had that revolting tongue. No one could ever love someone like that, could they? In that way?

'_I could,'_ she thought. No, that wasn't possible. She was the Scarlet Witch; she didn't fall in love especially with people like Toad. She rolled over and closed her eyes. She was going back to sleep. She wasn't up to thinking about this right now.

'_That's right,'_ she thought as she began to slide back to sleep, '_Just sleep, it'll all make sense later when you feel better. Just drift . . . just sleep.'_ She thought no more. Instead she dreamed; she dreamt a slightly different version of last night. In this version Lance didn't interrupt them, neither of them fought it, and they went as far as it would take them. It was pure heaven, better than any intoxicant.

XXXXXXX

Lance heard someone come down the stairs. He stopped flipping through channels and saw it was Tabby. Apparently she had helped herself to a shower.

"Sleep well?" asked Lance.

"Always," replied Tabby, "Did get a tad lonely though." She grinned at him and snatched the remote.

"Hey," complained Lance as she changed the channel, "I was usin' that."

"And now you're not," finished Tabby. Lance sighed. It was like she lived here all over again.

"Why do you do that?" he asked, "You always do stuff like this. You act like the whole world revolves around you."

"Because I can," replied Tabby simply. Lance sighed. Women.

"That's not a good enough answer," he replied, "I just wanna know why you act this way."

"You really wanna know?" asked Tabby as she looked him dead in the eye, "I'll tell ya. All my life all I've ever heard was 'You're wrong', 'Do it this way', 'Why do you have to be such a screw-up', 'Do it my way because I said so', shit like that. I just got tired of taking it so I started doing things my way and found out I liked it."

Lance didn't say anything. Why was it every girl that walked into the house had to have so much emotional baggage? Rogue had it, Tabby apparently had it, and Wanda had it times ten. Was it like a prerequisite or something?

"Hey, Lance?" asked Tabby, "How come you guys let Psycho Smurfette kick me out?" Lance didn't really know why. He had felt bad for a little bit but then Wanda had cut loose and his survival instincts kicked into overdrive. Sure Tabby wasn't the greatest housemate but everybody needed some place to belong.

"I don't know," he replied, "Look, it's not like I was particularly for it or anything. You're lucky you weren't around when Mystique was. She's the boss, what she says goes."

"That's a complete load," replied Tabby, "Why do you take shit from her? What's she gonna do to you?"

"It's not just her," explained Lance, "You don't know the half of it. Things have gotten completely screwed up. We're mixed up in something we shouldn't even be involved in."

"Lance, I know the score," replied Tabby, "You're workin' for big, bad Magneto now. I do hear things at the mansion, you know?"

"Look, if it were as easy as you say then we would've already done it," explained Lance, "but things are complicated, Tabby. You can't just do what you want all the time."

Tabby just smiled and shook her head sadly. Lance knew she was making more sense than him. The simple fact was it was that easy. If they just kicked Pietro out and told Magneto not to come bother them then their problems would be over. Unfortunately, there would be the inevitable backlash. Eventually, Magneto would either kill them or force them to help him again. Some choice.

Lance didn't even notice when Tabby got up and walked over to him. He did notice, however, when she kissed him on the lips.

"What?" he asked as they separated but Tabby put her finger on his lips to shush him.

"Yes, you can," she said simply with a mischievous smile, "Think about it, Lancey."

"Wait, what just happened?" asked Lance, slightly confused.

"I did what I wanted," said Tabby, "What I waited a long time to do." Lance looked at her. Did she love him? Was that it?

"Wait a minute," he said, "Are you sayin' that . . ."

"Give the boy a prize," smirked Tabby, "Yeah, Lance, I had a thing for you while you were busy chasin' after Kitty. I didn't wanna screw it up for you though because you actually looked happy for once so I kept it to myself."

"What about now?" he asked. That was the question, wasn't it? How did he feel about her? Sure he had fun hanging out with her last night, more fun than he'd ever had with Kitty. He felt like he could finally be himself for once.

"Who knows," replied Tabby, "Like you said, things are complicated. That was just to see what things could've been like."

"So what could it have been like?" asked Lance.

"Like I finally found a place to belong," replied Tabby, "Like I finally found someone I could be myself around." She moved towards the door. Lance watched her go.

"I'll tell Kitty you said hello when she gets back," said Tabby, "Oh and Lance, don't worry about what people will say if we start something. I'm the bad seed at the mansion, remember?"

"Okay," said Lance as Tabby left. Well, that had been awkward. He didn't really know what to think now. Him and Tabby? It was certainly more likely than him and Kitty but still he just didn't know. He liked her and everything and last night had been fun but did he really want every night to be last night? Was walking on the wild side any way to live the rest of your life?

"Who was that?" asked Wanda as she came down the stairs. Lance arched his eyebrow. She really didn't need to be up.

"Tabby," replied Lance, "She used to live here. You kinda took her place. She ran into us last night and spent the night here."

"Oh," said Wanda as she looked at the glass on the floor, "Uhm, do you mind if I fix that?"

"Are you sure you're up for it?" asked Lance skeptically.

"Yeah," replied Wanda as she held up her hand. Instantly the shards of glass reconfigured themselves back into a window and five empty bottles. Wanda groaned as she sat down on the couch.

"You okay?" asked Lance.

"Not really," replied Wanda as she laid down on the couch. Lance moved over to a chair next to the couch.

"Hey, Lance?" asked Wanda quietly, "How do you know when you're in love?" Lance was silent for a moment. He wasn't sure how to answer it.

"You just do," he said, "It's not something you can describe, really. You just know it."

"What if you're not sure?" asked Wanda, "Does that mean you're not in love?"

"Maybe," replied Lance, "or it could mean you are but you're just scared of it." Wanda's face soured. Apparently that was not a desired response.

"Give Todd a chance," suggested Lance as he got up to throw away the bottles, "He's a really good guy and he really cares about you." Wanda nodded as she stared at the ceiling. Well of course he loved her, she could see that. That wasn't the problem. The problem was her. She wasn't sure if she loved him too. She looked over at the TV. She needed a distraction, a safe one this time. She looked around for the remote but couldn't find it. She pulled a pillow over her head and tried going back to sleep. Alcohol, TV, sleep, they were all just distractions to take her mind off her problems. In the end, all they really were were just temporary solutions.


End file.
